Calving Part I. Babies is comin’: 4 the girls & men that did it to them

She's not very happy and he not too with her.

First, a little music for you to read by.  I was a childbride, but childless & footloose for five years. A favorite courting technique, John would break into song complete with face and head gestures to serenade, emphasis on the “baay’ beh”. Even not funnier at 8 months. After a four versions on utube, I’m just starting to appreciate it all. Your selection for tonight: Classic Paul in Patchwork and Bowler.

It’s the first week of calving season, John’s week on call as baby dr., so I tagged to barn at 10:30.  Heifers are teen (I hope not really) cows having first calves who sometimes need a little help. They are brought in from the pastures to hang out together in the pens.

Second, the excuses. It’s dark, pics in pens limited, only lights on a pole. With camera broken, I’m filming a blackberry video (I keep forgetting I can’t turn the camera sideways since u can’t rotate videos, I’m sure Steve Spielberg had to learn this too). New skills are all I can do to get unedited to utube, but this is a point in history.

Re-location from pens to delivery room: the calving barn.

I really apologize mama. My style: no cameras and leave me alone when in pain; John seized the opportunity for his usual efficiences to wash the car, pick up groceries, stop by the vet when I thought he was outside having a smoke. But, he was there at Lace’s debut at my head of the table.

Pass a new baby en route to barn. Mother licking to clean and I scare but she'll be back.

This is more talking about childbirth than I could ever tolerate from about 28 on. All it takes is one long-winded, detailed story relayed by some duo couple in a social situation to be enough for life.

Calving chute, looks medieval I know.

Construction by D. (Dave Holden) and M. (Mike Simmons), circa 1982.

A stirrup, right girls? Hmmm....way up there? Think, think, Paula, before you ask engineering question. I know I can figure out the mechanics.

Pretty much everything designed, mostly homemade and welded right here when it comes to stuff like this.

Pretty busy, so I keep quiet and don’t ask questions.  Here are more pictures…

She's not very happy and he not too with her.

Got her in a headlock.

Dennis Knudsen, former army dr., obgyn extraordinare and Renaissance man I think would secretly love one of these for a few of his clients. A relative on John’s side out here told me (in 80s we took these funny lamaze classes pre-Lacy at local community college) he said , “ooh…kay, that’s enough of that” when she commenced with some loud hee-haws as he arrived for the delivery.

Chapter Two tomorrow. The birth and some videos, more Paul. I’m sure he quit singing a while ago.

Music commentary:  John’s time is limited on computer, but he heard Paul singing and had to come in.

Paula:  “that woman’s voice sounds strange…crazed…techno”

John:  “she’s just happy. see? she’s agreeing with him.”

Thanks, Paul for opener that kind of steals my show, but if someone made it this far…

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